I'm currently 38.5 weeks pregnant. It's getting so so close now. How crazy isn't thinking I'm going to pop a baby anytime now :D
As my due date is getting so close now, I have this weird feeling (not sure if other second time mums can relate) it's like having a strong separation anxiety with my first born. I feel like every moment I spend with my son is extremely precious, much more precious than before and I feel like that precious time is getting shorter & shorter.. The connection with him is just getting stronger & I'm afraid of losing what I'm currently holding tight once the new baby is out and I'm afraid things between us will change. Never knew the transition from 1st time mum to 2nd time mum can be that difficult. Nevertheless, I hope the relationship with first child remains strong & will never ever change even though I'm having a new baby :)
At this stage, I'm doing pretty okay ~ no complaints so far except a little backache here and there and soreness in my V area (not sure why too!)
My super round belly ~ it's so wide! Left and right side of my belly are equally swollen! And I think my popped out belly button looks funny! :D
Highlights at 38 weeks:
1) Leaking Colostrum ~ I wake up every morning with yellowish dry skin on my nipples I suspect as colostrum and I'm right ~ the other day, I tried to press gently my right nipple and a tiny drop of super yellow liquid came out but funnily on my left nipple, there was only a drop of transparent liquid. I guess left boob is not ready to produce colostrum yet.
I can tell that milk production will kick in more quickly in the 2nd birth than the 1st one. I remember day 1 after I gave birth to EJ, I had to press my nipples really hard (until it really hurt) to see a tiny drop of colostrum. So I just hope breastfeeding will be easier & more natural this time round :)
I have also started applying nipple cream twice a day, kind of nourishing it before the real breastfeeding kicks in :) So I won't face dry, cracked, painful nipples during direct latching for the first time!
2) Coffee ~ I just have craving for a cup of coffee in the morning & yes I have it! I know that drinking caffeine during pregnancy is not good but I guess one cup in the morning won't be that harmful, right? I used to drink a cup of coffee in the morning before I got pregnant & coffee never failed to wake me up but during pregnancy, coffee has no effect on me at all. I still feel tired & sleepy!
Pregnancy craving does change! Last week I craved for chocolate & I had to eat a bar every day and this week's craving is coffee!!
3) Watching movie is no longer fun ~ Yesterday I watched hunger games part 2 with my husband thinking this is our last movie before the baby is here but turned out I didn't enjoy my movie at all. My back was so sore from sitting down for 2 hours without pillow support & worst part was I needed to go to loo every 30 minutes. So annoying!
4) Braxton Hick Contractions are getting stronger and more frequently ~ sometimes I think I'm in labor but nope, I'm not! The tightening can be really strong although not painful but it's really uncomfortable and it can come many times in one hour time, especially when I walk, bend down or stand up.
5) Nesting Part 3 is done ~ I'm done! That's it! Nesting is a serious business! My whole body is very sore now ~ everywhere especially my back. Seriously that's it! Baby Cal, just come whenever you're ready!
6) Baby Movements & Kicks ~ Everywhere! but her favorite spot is my right ribs! She loves the right side of my belly so much & most of her movements are on my right side! Occasionally, she's on my left but most of the time, right is her all the time favo!
7) Talking to her every night ~ Yes, I do talk to her every night before I go to bed. What do I talk?
"Cal Cal (Calysta's nickname), when you're born, please be a good girl, latch on and breastfeed well. Give your mommy plenty of rest & sleep, so she can take a good care of you & produce you plenty of milk. Please don't be cranky at night, do sleep through the night, be an easy going baby and most importantly, be healthy and happy all the time!
I talk the same to her every single night! And that's my wish for her!
I made my own reflections! As a second time mum & as a mum who has been through motherhood for the past 19 months, motherhood has taught me many things I didn't know before nor I didn't expect it to be.. And I really think it's good to sit down, reflect, write down and perhaps make changes about it? I'm someone who prefers to pour the content of my heart through writing and here are my 10 reflections as a mum who has been going through motherhood for the past 1.5 years and here are things motherhood taught me:
1) A mum can be very protective
Even simple things like "Do the germs get into my child and make him sick if he touches dirty shoes?", "Why didn't you wipe his hand with anti bacterial wipes?", "Oh no, that stranger auntie is touching him again, will he get germs or something?" Sounds familiar? A little simple thing can make a mum paranoid and extra protective!
2) A mum needs to be & stays strong
She has too! Who else can wake up every one hour to check her child's temperature when he's having fever? Who else can monitor her child so timely to make sure his medications are taken on time? Who else can rush to the hospital back and forth and do everything it takes to ensure the child is happy & healthy? Who else can be that strong to watch a sick child vomiting his medication, crying his lungs out, yet never give up, but to stay strong and repeating the process over and over again?
3) A mum is a decision maker
A strong decision maker on her children! Not dad nor other family members! Mum decides what's the best for her child and mum's natural instinct is really that strong & accurate and so her decision is mostly the best for her child's well being. Most of the time, she will be very careful, do lots of researches before making that decision!
4) A mum is from Venus & a dad is from Mars
A mum loves to rant and share about her day being a mother to her man without wanting a solution sometimes but man tends to take woman's sharing as complaints and he wants to find parenting solutions for his woman, but at the end, finding solutions for his woman can interrupt his concentration at work, thus affecting his work performance. And eventually, it affects the relationship between man and his woman. I came far to learn about this, ranting to your man is not a solution but it's the root of every family problem. Parenting is not only about the relationship between you and your child but it's also about you and your husband.
5) A mum sacrifices everything
Her sleep, her beauty, her career, her youth, her health, her time, her hobbies, things she wants. And her children are always her top priority. A mum sacrifices with no regret at all!
6) A mum needs to learn to block unnecessary comments
Comments about how you raise your child is getting more hurtful when you are a mother yourself.
Does this sound familiar?
"Your milk supply is low, just top up with formula milk!"
"Your milk is too watery, no wonder baby doesn't like it!"
"Don't you worry about your child?"
"Don't you care about your child?"
"Why did you feed him that?"
"Don't take this, it's not good for your child!"
"Your child should...." "Your child shouldn't.."
Seriously, when those unnecessary comments come from your family members, it sucks 100 times more than comments you receive from strangers if you know what I mean? And it's quite a trick to ignore & block those unnecessary comments without getting upset or angry! Motherhood does teach a woman to grow up and to be more mature in handling problems like this!
7) The world doesn't always revolve around us and our children
Sometimes, it's not all about us and our children, selfishly we want the best for our children without thinking about others or our actions towards others but we are not the center of this world, we are PART of this world! Many things we just can't change! Our entire lives don't just revolve around our children, there must be a balance of everything I believe!
8) Children are forgiving
This is what I learned from my 19 month old son. I was angry with him, so I scolded him and I screamed! 10 minutes later, he acted like nothing happened ~ he gave me his biggest smile and hugged me! Can we learn from our children to be that forgiving?
9) And so, mum feels guilty but moves on fast!
Because children are so forgiving and thus we feel guilty screaming at them, isn't? A mum's voice can be loud & fierce but her heart will remain soft for her children.
10) And this shall pass too!
Everything will pass too! I have been through the period when my child:
"Went on food strike"
"Had sleeping terrors ~ waking up & crying non stop"
"Had fever more than 39.8 degree"
"Had bacterial infections"
"Was sick for 2 weeks and I had to force feed him medications with so much heart breaks"
"Refused to nurse"
"Was crying & couldn't sleep because he had bad flu & cough"
"Wasn't well yet I received unnecessary comments that added more pressure than I already had"
But every single thing I mentioned above passed too! And every single thing will be back to normal! Amazingly, despite things I went through, I'm still enjoying being a mum!
Motherhood is simply awesome!
~38.5 weeks and counting, so see you soon labor ward!~